Look to me in my eyeball.

Random thoughts which peppered my head today:

Love songs are like a tepid bath. They may start out warm and comforting; but really, you’re just languishing in crap.

Why is Sarah Silverman popular? I prefer silent Snoopy.

My average week is akin to Zallinger’s March of Progress, in reverse. Mondays, I’m a Darwinian dream. Come Friday, I’m hobo erectus.

If I ever make the sequel to Popeye, it’ll center around his older brother – Cockeye.

Gal Gunslinger reads and reveres serial killers. Red flag. Red flag. Stop right there! (To be said in Bourne baritone.)

I looked up ‘titillating’ in my thesaurus and the answer came back: venereal. Sounds about right.

If I were rich, I’d create an underwater movie theatre – where you’d get your dive on and watch the Life Aquatic, aquatically. There’d be a sushi snack bar, mermaids for ushers, and Usher as a mer-man (to be said like Zoolander).

I’ve decided to name my cleavage Fortitude Valley.

About the wuc

I'm a chick living in Australia, working for the man. I hate office work with a passion usually reserved for James Cameron, but somehow I ended up with a career behind a desk, stapling my forehead at random intervals.

57 Responses to “Look to me in my eyeball.”

  1. Hey the wuc,
    You’re such a talented blogger and I love the humour I get from your blogs. Your thoughts go from anywhere to everywhere and that’s what I love about it.
    I’ve nominated you for the 7 x 7 Link Award (read more here), and I hope you’ll pass it on.
    I love your blog & happy holidays!
    ‘Nessa.

  2. Dear Wuc, because you are so Wuccalicious and yours is the funniest darn blog I have read, I nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award. You can find the link here.

    Happy Holidays and don’t ever lose your wit and humour!

  3. I also gave you the Versatile Blogger award, but in the interest of originality, I put it under the category of “We Don’t Need No Fucksauce”. Check it out.

  4. Just my acknowledgment of your fantastic blog: versatile blogger award.

  5. Came over on a link from Trask Avenue and can’t stop laughing. I will never look at Tori’s cleavage the same way. Oops, wrong post. Yeah, back to where I am now . . . Can I name mine Valley Forge?

  6. Yeah, Sarah Silverman is overrated. When you first start watching her you think “ooh this is a sassy chick” but it goes nowhere.

  7. Snow? This time of year? Note to self; cancel Xmas Holiday to Perth…even quake-ridden CHCH seems a better option.
    In saying that, Perth is a good place, really; perfectly situated miles away from the rest of us although I must share your pain in becoming the new Bondi and filling up with Kiwis…eek. Make sure you lock your valuables away, do not stop and feed the animals, please.

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